Chapter 751
Ren Xue
Soon, the God of Destruction left, and after he left, Tranquil Garden fell into silence.
The image of Tang Wulin standing at the edge of the abyss rift still echoed in Qian Renxue's mind. That figure, firmly declaring "I exist," made her feel a strange sense of familiarity.
What kind of feeling is that?
Qian Renxue slowly walked towards the depths of the Tranquil Garden, where she often came to meditate beneath the paulownia trees. The golden leaves shimmered in the eternal glow of the divine realm, each one like a solidified flame. She reached out and caught a falling paulownia leaf, feeling its faint yet real warmth in her palm.
"It exists," she murmured.
What does this word mean to her?
Qian Renxue was once the Crown Prince of the Heaven Dou Empire, a Holy Maiden of the Spirit Hall, the inheritor of the Angel God, a comrade-in-arms who fought alongside Tang San, and also his sworn enemy. She experienced too many identities, too many roles, too many definitions. But when everything settles down, when she finally sheds all the labels and is simply "Qian Renxue," who is she then?
She had never truly faced this problem.
The paulownia leaves in her palm gradually dimmed, eventually turning into golden specks of light and dissipating. Everything in the divine realm possessed a certain eternal quality, yet it seemed unreal, almost ethereal. There were no changing seasons, no birth, aging, sickness, or death, no raw and vibrant life force like that of the mortal world. Sometimes, Qian Renxue felt as if she were trapped in a beautiful and eternal dream.
"The embodiment of existence," she recalled the information Tang Wulin had gleaned from the stone slab.
If Tang Wulin's chosen path is to become the embodiment of "being," to spread, to confirm, to connect, then what is her path?
Qian Renxue closed her eyes, trying to feel her own "existence".
At first, there was only emptiness. It wasn't nothingness, but a sense of bewilderment. She felt the weight of her divine position, the flow of angelic power, and the indelible memories deep within her soul—her mother's passing, her grandfather's expectations, her entanglement with Tang San, and the loneliness and perseverance through the long years. But these all seemed external, things attached to "her".
Then who is the core "she"?
“No,” Qian Renxue suddenly opened her eyes, a sharp glint in them, “you’re wrong.”
She realized she had made a fundamental mistake. She was searching for a pure "self" independent of everything, but that was precisely the "nihilistic" trap that Tang Wulin was fighting against. If the essence of "being" is diffusion and connection, then the "self" is not an isolated existence, but a network composed of countless relationships, memories, and choices.
Her existence is precisely because she is Bibi Dong's daughter, Qian Daoliu's granddaughter, the former Crown Prince of Tian Dou, the inheritor of the Angel God, and someone who has had a complicated entanglement with Tang San. These are not masks that cover up the true self, but rather the warp and weft that constitute the true self.
Qian Renxue stood up and walked to the edge of the Tranquil Garden. There, a pool of clear water lay, its surface as still as a mirror, reflecting the eternally azure sky of the divine realm. She looked down at her reflection in the water—long golden hair, deep eyes, a still-young face, yet bearing the weight of thousands of years of memories.
“I exist,” she said to her reflection, “because my mother brought me into this world, because she looked at me with such complex emotions. I exist because my grandfather placed all his hopes on me, because he believed I could complete his unfinished work. I exist because I fought for the future of the Heaven Dou Empire, because I believed in that ideal. I exist because I chose to inherit the Angel Godhood, because I was willing to bear that responsibility. I exist because I fought Tang San, because I hated him, and because he changed me. I exist because I experienced failure and rebirth, because I did not give up in despair.”
Each "because" is like a thread, weaving the web of her existence.
The reflection in the water rippled slightly, but Qian Renxue's gaze grew increasingly resolute. "I am not a 'pure existence'," she continued to mutter to herself, "I am the sum of all these relationships, the crystallization of all choices, the form after all experiences have settled. Trying to peel away these to find the 'true me' is true self-denial."
As soon as she finished speaking, something deep within her soul was touched.
That wasn't a "seed of existence" like Tang Wulin's, but a completely different feeling—a sedimentation, a solidification, an essence extracted from complexity. If Tang Wulin's seed of existence was a light spreading outwards, then what Qian Renxue felt was a density condensing inwards.
She suddenly understood.
Tang Wulin's way of combating nothingness is "diffusion," connecting all things and becoming the core of the network of existence. But Qian Renxue's path may be exactly the opposite—not diffusion, but "cohesion"; not connecting more, but becoming an indivisible "whole".
She recalled hearing a philosopher from the Eastern Continent say in Douluo Continent: "The hardest substance is metal; the most enduring substance is stone." Metal is hard because of its density; stone is enduring because of its integrity. There is more than one way to combat nothingness. Tang Wulin chose to become an undeniable "source of light," while she should perhaps become an indestructible "metal and stone."
This realization caused a subtle change deep within Qian Renxue's soul. She felt an unprecedented sense of "reality"—not radiating outwards, but settling inwards. Every inch of her skin, every strand of her soul power, every memory became more "real," more "weighty," and more "true."
“But that’s not enough,” Qian Renxue frowned. “If it’s just self-condensation, I’m still isolated. An isolated existence, no matter how strong, can still be erased in the face of the Eye of Annihilation’s complete denial.”
She needs to find her own way to connect to this existing network, but not in the same way that Tang Wulin spreads.
Qian Renxue left the Tranquil Garden and headed towards the Divine Realm Library. She needed to learn more about existence, about nothingness, about the most fundamental truths of this world.
The Library of the Gods is an incredible place. Its exterior is merely an ordinary white hall, but its interior space extends infinitely, with bookshelves stretching in all directions and disappearing into the distance. The library houses not only the history of the divine realm and records of civilizations from various worlds, but also many ancient texts concerning the very nature of the universe.
Qian Renxue wandered among the bookshelves, searching for books that might be related to "existence." But she soon discovered that most of this knowledge was recorded in obscure symbols and metaphors, offering no direct guidance. Just as the God of Destruction had said, the way of existence must be comprehended by oneself and cannot be simply taught.
However, as she walked deeper into an inconspicuous corner of the library, something strange happened. (End of Chapter)