Chapter 1290
Forest Fairy
Sextant
The people from Agency S looked at the sextant in front of them and thought it must have been quite a lot of work for them.
The ward reeked of a mixture of disinfectant and ointment. The stark white walls reflected the human figure wrapped in bandages on the bed. Rokubungi Gendo lay on his back, only his eyes and nostrils visible, looking like a freshly unearthed mummy. His left leg was suspended in the air, his right leg was in a heavy cast, and his arms were restrained at his sides with braces. Even turning his head required the assistance of a caregiver.
How many times has this happened?
Admitted to the hospital.
The liaison officer from Agency S flipped through the medical records in his hand, his lips twitching. The first time was an "accident" after the kidnapping, the second time was being beaten by security guards who mistook him for a monster, the third time was falling off the hospital bed resulting in a second fracture, and the fourth time was choking on liquid food, which triggered a violent cough and broke his ribs. This was the seventh time he had been hospitalized, and each time the diagnosis was strikingly consistent: comminuted fractures, multiple soft tissue contusions throughout the body, and long-term bed rest was recommended.
Each time it was a comminuted fracture.
"Sextant, we've all seen your sacrifices. Thank you for your hard work."
The liaison officer's voice carried genuine sympathy, along with an undeniable sense of absurdity. He recalled a joke circulating within the organization—"Lord Sextans is either in the hospital or on his way there." The once fearsome NERV commander, the thirteenth member of SEELE, had now become the S Agency's highest-spending individual in terms of annual medical insurance expenditures.
"Can you say something practical?"
The sound of the sextant came through the gaps in the bandages, muffled and heavy with a nasal tone. His eyes—the eyes that had once been hidden behind orange lenses, eyes that had instilled fear in countless people—were now cloudy and tired, the whites of his eyes bloodshot. He tried to raise his fingers, but the brace prevented him from even this simple movement.
At this moment, the sextant is communicating with the base circuit.
On the screen beside the hospital bed, the aged face of Kiro Lorenz was displayed. As the actual controller of SEELE, he should have been sitting in a solemn conference room, surrounded by stone tablets engraved with numbers, but now the background was an ambiguous pink hue, and the distant, noisy music could be faintly heard.
Logically speaking, this shouldn't be done.
SEELE's communications should use the highest level of encryption, with layers of firewalls and physical isolation to ensure absolute security. However, Sextant's current situation is far too unique—his hospital room is monitored by NERV, by the S Agency, and by some inexplicable world will. Ironically, on the world's largest dating website for this type of person, Kiro unexpectedly discovers a loophole: the more blatant the activity, the less likely anyone is to thoroughly investigate.
What a pity.
Sextant is currently so unlucky that he can choke even when drinking cold water.
Kiru and his group tried to rescue people, but each time they ended up not knowing what was going on.
“We dispatched our most elite agents,” Kiro’s voice was filled with confusion and anger, “but the mission instructions were always inexplicably altered. Last week’s operation, the rendezvous point was changed to a VIP box at a nightclub; the rescue plan the week before that, the code name became ‘Searching for tonight’s forest spirit.’”
They always post tasks on the world's largest gay dating website.
A painful groan came from beneath the sextant's bandages. He knew that website all too well—his "personal channel" now boasted over half a million subscribers, with people sending tips, leaving comments, and asking when "Mr. Forest Fairy" would update with new videos every day. His screams were edited into various versions, set to cheerful music, and widely circulated within a certain circle.
And then...
Anyway, the sextant has no shortage of people to take care of it lately.
The ward door was pushed open, and a man wearing a bodysuit and a feather mask walked in, carrying a bowl of steaming liquid food. He was a "nursing volunteer" sent by the "fan club" and had been serving here for three consecutive days. His "skilled" techniques gave Sextant nightmares every night.
Every day, it emits screams just like Tom's.
"Ouch—!!!"
Sextant's scream when the lace-gloved hand "accidentally" touched his plaster cast leg was indeed very much like Tom's.
The voice was high-pitched, melodious, with a trembling vibrato at the end. Outside the window, a passing crow was startled and flew away in a flurry. Of course, on Cui Ming's side, Spike the big dog, Tom the cat, and Jerry were all helping with the filming.
In an office at NERV, Spike, a cigar dangling from his lips, steadily operated the camera; Talking Tom adjusted the lighting and angles to ensure every expression was captured clearly; Jerry sat at the control panel, skillfully editing the video, adding effects and background music. They worked together seamlessly, like a professional team that had been doing this for decades.
Cui Ming couldn't be bothered to look at this eyesore.
Release it directly!
Click the mouse to complete the upload. Video title: "The Forest Fairy's Morning Care Routine #28", tags: #beard #matureman #realreaction. Hundreds of comments flooded the comment section instantly, and donation notifications echoed throughout.
Now the sextant has its own special name!
Forest Fairy!
To countless gay enthusiasts, Sextant's little beard is... hey! awesome!
Look! It's like a little wild horse!
In the video, Sextant tries to stare at the camera with its only movable eye, its muscles taut under the bandages, and a low whimper escapes its throat. This "resistance" is interpreted as "playing hard to get," and this "anger" is understood as "part of role-playing."
She really knows how to bring fun to everyone, just like she genuinely dislikes men!
"He's so good!" one highly-rated comment read. "That restrained expression, that suppressed emotion, that look of pain masking dignity—professional! Absolutely professional!"
Hey! That's awesome!
Another comment echoed, "Mr. Forest Fairy must have acted like that for us. How could anyone be that unlucky in real life? It's all for the show! Let's give him a reward!"
He knows it all too well! The more they struggle, the more excited they get!
Sextans closed his eyes in despair on his hospital bed. He heard the "nursing volunteer" exchanging tips with the "fans" in the next room, discussing how to "evoke emotions" and how to make the "performance" more "realistic." He wanted to roar, to scream, to prove that he was truly the commander of NERV, the chief executor of the Human Instrumentality Project, the Sextans Gendo who made the world tremble.
But only a weak, Tom-like groan could escape from his throat:
"Ouch—!!!"
On the screen, Kilo watched silently, finally sighing, "Sexant, hold on. We'll figure something out."
"Hurry up, you guys!!!"
Sextant's screams echoed in the ward, perfectly captured by the hidden microphone, becoming the latest material for tonight's update.
In a corner of the city, a boy who was scrolling through his phone stopped. Kaworu looked at the bandaged figure on the screen, a flicker of pity in his red eyes.
“How pitiful,” he said softly, “but that’s fate.”
He turned off the video, opened another animation, and a relaxed smile appeared on his face.
After all, the apostles are no longer relevant. (End of Chapter)